Erotic Review Magazine

No Sex Please, We're Miller Harris…

26th July 2013

Despite the best efforts on his behalf by the Ed., John D. Michaelis’ article Affordable Luxuries was thwarted by the branding watchdogs of trendy fragrance merchants Miller Harris – and possibly Lyn Harris herself. After waiting some time for Lyn’s pronouncement on what her sexiest parfum de vacances might be, we got a message that ‘Lyn is often unavailable as involved with private clients, or simply tied up in the Laboratory’. Nothing like a good double entendre, we thought, and titters went around the editorial dept. of ER. But then Miller Harris got all prim; after another lengthy wait we were told by their marketing agency that they weren’t prepared to assist us in our quest for perfume perfection. Despite one of their scents, L’air de rien, being billed as ‘an expression of the life and style’ of the saucy Franglaise thesp, the unbelievably fragrant Jane Birkin, famous for her ‘orgasmic’ double act with bad-boy Serge Gainsbourg, singing that song Je t’aime…moi non plus. How self-deceiving is that, we thought. However we’re a forgiving lot, here at Erotic Towers, so we decided to promote their range anyway. The Evening Standard’s Londoner’s Diary picked up the story. But please be nicer in future, Lyn, or we may promote your rivals, Estée Lauder’s Joe Malone, instead. However something tells me they might be equally disinclined to assist: branding is all that matters these days, it would seem. Perish the thought that wearing scent might actually be construed as an enhancement of sexual allure…

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